I am sitting here on the floor, crying and praying that my daughter stops screaming and takes a nap. Today has been a terrible day and I should’ve known by how the day started.
My kids have been sleeping great after the time change sleeping until 8 or sometimes after. But today was a different story. Not only did Ruthie wake up a little after 7, but she woke up kicking and whaling. It was horrible. I’ve heard these screams before so I wasn’t too concerned, I was just hoping she would go back to sleep like she has before, but no such luck. I went into their room and of course she had woke up her sister so I was prepared for some cranky babies, but thankfully, they were in descent moods.
I had already planned the day out since it was beautiful out and was hoping the kids would be good. I packed them up and headed to a near by park that was fenced it that they have already been to once before and loved may I add. Once I got them into the park they seemed fine. It wasn’t that long that I noticed Simon acting funny. He of course had a nice stinky for me and I of course left the diaper bag in the van. So off I ran which Ruthie just hated and let me know it by screaming her head off until she saw me walk back. I grabbed a diaper to change the boy and noticed it was my last one. Great! What mom forgets diapers?! I was hoping no one else would decide to drop a load, but of course, just a few minutes later…..another “duck”. And guess who it was? As I dreaded changing her, I had to walk her back to the van since the bag didn’t have any more diapers. I thought about going home, but realized I had diapers in the van just a size smaller. Even though it was a snug fit, it worked. However, Ruthie didn’t want to go back to the park. So, forcefully we walked back to her siblings. It lasted a whole 5 more minutes before I said “SCREW IT” and decided to head to the car.
Ruthie was being Ruthie and didn’t want to hold my hand so she walked behind me while Simon (the limp noodle) was on my left and Lo holding my hand on my right. It was ok until we were 5ft away. Lo decides to dart right and Ruthie darted left while I am stuck holding onto a heavy boy who is giving me nothing to work with. Yelling “STOP”, “COME HERE” or “NO” wasn’t working and I was getting frustrated and stressed. I put Simon in the car and chased his sisters. After I had them loaded I decided to continue what I had planned even though my morning wasn’t going as I thought. So…onto Kroger.
I had to get some things so I figured while we were out we could go to the grocery. I’ve done it many times before and they are usually pretty good. When I pull into the parking lot I notice there isn’t a single cart anywhere to be seen. I rely on even one cart so I can get them inside safely. I almost turned around and went home, but I took a deep breath and decided to suck it up. I get them out of their car seats and the girls are already trying to get out of the van before I could even get their brother out. I had to chase both girls twice while Simon sat next to the van. It was a nightmare! I was hoping to hold Simon and Lo’s hands on one side and Ruthie on the other side. Well…Simon decided he was done walking and wouldn’t help me at all. So here I am with Simon on my hip, Lo holding my right hand and my left hand holding onto Ruthie’s hood. We made it safely, but not happily into Kroger.
Once I got everyone into the cart the real fun started. Right as we walk through the sliding door Ruthie starts to scream bloody murder. It was soooooo embarrassing. So the rest of the trip I had to carry her and push this beastly cart around. We managed what seemed like the longest shopping trip of my life and headed home. I thought once they had their toys everything would be good but boy was I stupid! The tantrums started because they were all hungry. Simon was pulling on my pants, Lo was whining and pushing me and Ruthie was crying about something which made for making lunch a disaster. The girls didn’t even eat good with being as “hungry” as they were. They cried and threw most of it.
What annoyed me the most about today wasn’t even all of the above, it was how Ruthie was with her therapist today. After giving me such a hard time, she was a perfect angel for her Speech Therapist. I could hear her repeating words, laughing and singing. Why does she hate me today? And as soon as her therapist leaves, the tantrums started all over again. Lo was jumping on me, Ruthie was kicking me and Simon was just ignoring it all. Thank goodness its nap time.
I love my children deeply, but sometimes I just don’t like them. You can call me a bad mother….sometimes I do too. If you are a mom and haven’t felt the way I did today then I think your lying. I noticed today while I was out I didn’t get many stares which surprised me. Usually on a day they are being amazing I get all kids of stares and finger pointing so I thought on a day where my kids are just being bears I would feel all eyes on me. Maybe its because they felt sorry for me, maybe they didn’t want to be rude or maybe they understood what I was going through. Let me just say this though…..please, never feel sorry for me. Even on days like this I know my life is wonderful and beautiful. I may not see it right in the moment, but give me a break, being a mom is the most stressful and hardest job ever. But I love my kids so in the end, its worth it!
PS- I had to type this blog much later because A) our laptop isn’t working, B) I tried on my phone and as I finished it some how got deleted and C) Ruthie woke up screaming from her nap early. Thank goodness my husband is giving me a break so I don’t loose my ever loving mind!
It's Triplicated 